


He About To Lose Me

by acklesbbykate



Series: Inspired By Songs [10]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Based on a song, Castiel Loves Dean Winchester, Castiel is Having Doubts, Dean Winchester Loves Castiel, Established Castiel/Dean Winchester, Happy Ending, M/M, Mild Angst, Relationship Issues, Short One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 10:09:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,220
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13051863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/acklesbbykate/pseuds/acklesbbykate
Summary: ~He couldn't come to understand when he had come to invest himself so much in it. Remembering how he used to spend his Saturday nights drinking his way from club to club until he found someone to take home. Now here he is with his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s group of friends, enjoying a night at the Roadhouse. He could hear a part of himself screaming, banging on the walls of his head, to run; that this is too much, too fast.~Cas's mind and heart battle against each other trying to reconcile who he was with who he is, and how Dean fits in to it all.I'm touching hands with someone seriously beautifulI feel it burning and I know I'm standing far too closeI'm telling lies and if it shows I see that he don't careI know he wants to take me home and get on out of here





	He About To Lose Me

**Author's Note:**

> Based on He About To Lose Me by Britney Spears  
> [Lyric Video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XACWRQWkRF0)

Cas leaned back against the bar, watching as Dean made his way to the restrooms. He sipped his newly refilled drink as he pondered the relationship with his boyfriend. He couldn't come to understand when he had come to invest himself so much in it. Remembering how he used to spend his Saturday nights drinking his way from club to club until he found someone to take home. Now here he is with his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s group of friends, enjoying a night at the Roadhouse. He could hear a part of himself screaming, banging on the walls of his head, to run; that this is too much, too fast. 

When he saw Dean step out from the restrooms and head straight for him, the part of him that loved Dean, loved what they have, where they’re going joined the cacophony of inner uncertainty.

“Cas, you okay babe? You still have that look on your face like something is wrong. I know I asked earlier and you said nothing was wrong, but I just wanted to check again. Do you want to leave?” When Dean rubbed a hand down Cas’s arm, Cas could feel the concern from the other man. He glanced up at him and came to a decision. 

“Actually, I was going to put my name down to sing on stage. I’m aware I have been a little distant. I have a song in mind that I think will help explain things to you. I’ll be right back.” He made his way to the DJ booth at the side of the stage and spoke to the DJ, writing down his name and the song he wanted to sing.

Cas turned back to go wait back at the table until his turn on stage when he was approached by a handsome man who began casually chatting with him, hinting at being interested in taking him home. Cas couldn’t help the flattery at the man’s interest; he also couldn’t help the twinge of aroused interest from that part of him that was having a hard time with his relationship with Dean. In the end, he couldn’t bring himself to do more than a little harmless flirting before excusing himself back to his boyfriend, only to see Dean already headed towards him. Dean’s expression was mostly closed off, but Cas could see the question in his eyes about catching his boyfriend flirting with another man.

“Cas?” Dean asked as he approached. Cas took his hand and pulled him to the dance floor, moving his hips with Dean’s to the sexy pop song being sung on stage by a surprisingly talented young woman. They swayed in each other’s arms, the movement of their bodies against the other and the lyrics of the song swelling their arousal for each other. When the DJ announced it was Cas’s turn on stage, Cas pressed a small kiss to the corner of Dean’s mouth then made his way on stage.

The lone guitar intro started to play, and Cas stepped up to the microphone, feeling the connection with the song fill his heart as the lyrics filled his mind. He closed his eyes and gripped the mic tighter as he sang, holding back from looking at Dean like he instinctually wanted to do.

_“I got someone waiting at home_  
_He says he in love, but lately I just don't know_  
_He don't see me or make me feel hot_  
_Banging in the club with all my ladies_  
_And he don't know that_

_He about to lose, ‘bout to lose, ‘bout to lose me_  
_He about to lose me”_

The lights were harsh as Cas opened his eyes; he sought out Dean, seeing that he had moved closer to the stage. He felt his heart twinge as Dean looked up at him with a mix of fear and love, hurt and adoration. He kept eye contact with Dean and swayed to the music, running his hands up into his hair as he continued singing, his smooth tenor voice breathing emotion into the lyrics. He pointed out to the audience and swung his hips a little as he thought about the dark-haired man hitting on him earlier.

_“Someone by the bar keeps looking at us dancing_  
_I see him staring at me, I see what he wants to be”_

He grabbed the mic again and poured his heart into the last of the song, losing himself in the repetition of the one line- _He about to lose, ‘bout to lose, ‘bout to lose me!_ -as the music evened out and the song drew to a close. Cas looked back at Dean and reached out his hand like he was going to touch Dean.

_“I'm touching hands with someone seriously beautiful.”_

When the music stopped and the Roadhouse erupted with applause, Cas made his way to the edge of the stage where Dean was waiting. Dean reached up and helped Cas hop down, then stood there looking down at him, all the mixed emotions playing across his face.

“Cas, I…” Dean began gruffly. Cas pressed a finger to Dean’s lips to stop him from speaking. Then he pulled Dean by his hand out to the parking lot. When they were alone in the cool night air, Cas turned and pulled his boyfriend into a hug. He could feel Dean’s need to question, his hesitancy to return the hug.

“Dean, allow me to explain my attitude the past few days. You know my past, my history, who I used to be until I met you. The past few days it hit me how much I’ve changed, and that all of it has been for and because of you. I’m scared at how fast and how strong our love has grown. I never thought I would have this, thought I wouldn’t want this. When I chose the song, I was intending it to reveal what I was feeling to you. But instead…instead I think it revealed what I was feeling to me. When I thought about what it would be like without you, without ‘us’, I realized that there is nothing in this world I want less that to lose you.”

Dean’s hands were warm when they cupped Cas’s cheeks. “Cas, I don’t want to lose you. I wish you had told me immediately when you were feeling overwhelmed. I was so scared that you were breaking up with me in that song, and then at the end when you reached out to me… Cas, my heart ached so bad to reach back. This is all so intense, but…I love you Cas. I’m in love with you. I don’t want to lose you, either, babe. As scary and intense and fast as this is, it still feels right to me. Does…does it still feel right to you?”

Cas bit his lip and looked up at the green-eyed man in front of him, seeing the sheer vulnerability in his eyes as he waited for Cas to either take a leap of faith and stay or push him away forever.

“I gotta go. There’s a seriously beautiful man I need to take home and show how much I love him.” Cas smiled as he saw the weight lift from Dean’s shoulders. He took his hand. “Let’s go home, Dean.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope y'all enjoyed this! This was a requested song. Kudos/Comment <3


End file.
